DRUNK DAD BILLY JOE MADDEN LETS BOY, 8, DRIVE CAR

TEACHING A boy to drive often falls to dad. It's just that usually they're closer to 16, not 8. Billy Joe Madden of Hattiesburg, Mississippi (where else) was hammered, according to cops, and so while he had a snooze he had his 8-year-old take over the driving while they traveled from Mississippi to Texas. He was doing the speed limit, Louisiana State Police said, adding he had to sit on the edge of his seat to reach the gas. His 4-year-old sister sat in the backseat. The child’s driving was apparently so erratic that it alarmed motorists, who called police.
His 28-year-old father--named Hattiesburg's best dad last year--was booked for child desertion and allowing a minor to drive. The vehicle was a green Chevy pick-up. Pretty dumb, huh?
DRUNK STUPID DAD ALLOWS BOY, 8, TO DRIVE

INDIANA HOOKER STEALS COP CAR AFTER COITUS

AN INDIANA WOMAN is facing a long stretch behind bars and a nomination for ‘dumbest criminal of the year’ after stealing a police car while being arrested for prostitution, cops say. Cara Ann Moynihan, 42, was ordered out of the bunk area of a parked semi after an officer responded to a call of a prostitute in the parking lot at Flying J. What were you doing in there, Cara? Moynihan was cuffed and put in the back seat of a cruiser. However, while speaking to a trucker, Moynihan squirmed into the front seat of the car and sped away.
Another officer saw the car pull into a nearby truck stop where witnesses saw a woman running with a set of handcuffs dangling from one wrist. When officers caught up with Moynihan she refused to obey their commands and
was tasered. Moynihan complained of pain and was rushed to a nearby hospital where blood tests showed she had a cocktail of alcohol and drugs in her system including benzodiazepine, cannabinoids, cocaine and opiates. Cops charged her with escape, auto theft, resisting law enforcement, drug possession and drunken driving. Moynihan said she “had freaked out” and stole the police car, the probable cause affidavit states.

MONDAY MUGSHOT MADNESS! COKE PINCH FOR JAY

TODAY on Monday Mugshot Madness, we celebrate the great city of Tampa, Florida. Jay Johnson, left, was busted for possession of cocaine. No shit, says you. Jay does indeed appear to be flying as he poses for the police camera. On the right, we have an artistic portrait of Justin Blair King. It's called: "I Fought the Law." No, seriously he is in deep shit: Atmp - Kidnap Inflict Bodily Harm Or Terrorize Vict Or Other, Aggravated Assault. See ya' around.